Choosing to Encourage
I was in the third grade when I painfully discovered something about myself. A teacher was giving a math lesson on the multiplication table using a chart with colored geometric shapes. She asked for a volunteer to provide the answer to 3X3, referring to the colored circles on the poster. I raised my hand, was called on, and enthusiastically shouted out, “Nine blue circles!” I knew I had the right answer. But the teacher’s response confused me. “No, they’re purple. What’s wrong with you?” She then asked another child to provide the “correct” answer. Everyone in the class was looking. That was the first time I remember feeling such shame. Something was wrong with me. A year later at an eye doctor’s appointment, I was diagnosed with a type of color blindness. Certain shades of blues and purples, among other colors, looked virtually the same in my world.
On the surface, this shouldn’t have been an event that left a scar. Yet more than 50 years later, it’s still quite vivid in my memory. I forgave the teacher who callously humiliated me a long time ago and have since learned to laugh off most of my color-blind blunderings. But the incident also highlighted for me the difference between merely calling out people’s weaknesses versus calling out courage for them to grow beyond their weaknesses and walk out their destiny.
What’s on God’s heart for me?
There are all kinds of human weaknesses. The Bible is clear that God is merciful, gentle, and kind. Yet He sees our sin and does not wink at it or write it off as merely a mistake. Our alienation from Him stems from the choice made long ago in human history, that people still affirm, to depend on our own understanding rather than on the One who made us. Jesus was sent to the earth to cover our shameful weaknesses and forgive and repair the damage done by our blatant sin. He does a perfect balancing act of truth and love.
So, how might God correct His children in their weaknesses and sin? He’s not afraid to point out the things in our lives that need to be mended or repented of. He loves us, after all, too much to let us remain the same, going around in circles in our brokenness. He desires to give us what we need to move forward. He sees each of us as we were meant to be: sons and daughters, members of His royal family. And that is the eternal future He is always drawing and calling us to.
Read MoreChoosing to Give What I Have
How many plans have been started with grand vision and then abandoned because of how insignificant and underwhelming the idea later felt? My visionary follow-through often struggles. Emotions of discouragement settle in when the glorious things I imagine don’t swiftly materialize.
Not seeing an acorn rapidly sprout into a mighty oak, could easily keep me from watering, nurturing, or even planting it in the first place. Difficulty envisioning a broken, painful relationship restored to something beautiful and lifegiving could keep me from pursuing it, praying for it, and persevering in hope. Even the process of what God desires to transform within me could stall before it starts as old fears, mindsets, and doubts stubbornly refuse to surrender their dominance. It’s so difficult to go all in when what I’m starting with is pitifully miniscule or deformed, carrying no resemblance of what I’m hoping for.
Exercising faith can be so hard.
Yet a tiny, mediocre, or unlikely beginning best describes the inception of so many significant undertakings. Only later is the fully-matured outcome looked upon as grand and imposing. God seems to have no problem starting with something or someone that is tiny, broken, or unimpressive. In the book of the prophet Zechariah, He warns His people to not wrongly judge the initial steps of rebuilding the temple. All they could see was a sadly mediocre foundation. It promised none of the greatness of the awe -inspiring place of worship that Solomon had built.
“Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin . . .” (Zechariah 4:10a NLT).
He Sees it Differently than Us
God was the hopeful One. He was delighted that what He had in mind was being acted upon. He didn’t degrade any part of the project that had begun in faithful obedience. But what do we tend to do when we despise something? Reject it. Neglect it. Disregard it. When we can’t see the significance, we easily turn our attention to other things, and in the process miss what God is doing and what He has in mind for our future and the future of the world.
Read MoreChoosing Real Worship
Some stories in the Bible have struck me as unfair, and at times I have found myself sympathizing with the “bad guy.” Take for example the parable of the three servants who received money from their master to invest while he was gone (Matthew 25:14-30). I can relate to the last servant who was given only one bag of money, compared to the other servants, with one receiving two and the other five. Of course he felt less important than the other two as well as unmotivated, feeling he could never be equal with them. And then the master treated the single-bag servant so harshly. In another version of the story, the master took the one bag of silver from the chastised servant and gave it to the one who already had 10 (Luke 19:11-27)! Unfair! Unfair!
I have, however, come to appreciate the lessons from this parable (like the consequences of comparing myself with others). Yet I’m still uncomfortable with how my natural sense of fairness is rarely affirmed in the Bible. It seems that God is more often interested in what goes on inside a person (the part others can’t see) than what is judged as right or wrong from outside observation. He sees and seeks to deal with a person at a heart level.
For No Apparent Reason
Another one that has bothered me over the years is the story of Cain and Abel (Genesis 4:1-16). The two brothers each brought gifts to the LORD as part of their worship. Cain was a farmer, and so he presented a sampling of his crops to God. Abel was a shepherd who brought a lamb. Makes sense so far. But then God responded by accepting Abel’s offering and rejecting Cain’s. Cain was angry and depressed about it. There’s no further explanation. No explicit commandment that was disobeyed. Cain became so ticked off at his younger brother that he killed him, the first murder. And while of course Cain’s response was evil, some have suggested that God provoked him. Why would God arbitrarily welcome one gift and accept another, especially when both were apparently brought as an act of worship? I have been tempted again to cry “unfair!”
I have determined that my starting point in digging deeper into questions like these must always be that God is good. I therefore presume there is more to the story than I’m seeing as an outside observer. Understanding what is going on here, however, is important because it is the first place in the Bible where worship (bringing gifts to God) is presented. And right from the beginning we’re being shown that there is worship that God accepts and there is worship that He does not accept. Knowing the difference and how God sees this could be important for a follower of Jesus.
Read MoreChoosing Effective Protection
Masks. How effective are they? The debate continues. Since the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic various coverings have been introduced in the attempt to protect against spreading the dreaded virus. Face shields. N95 masks. Full-body hazmat suits. The latter two fall under the category generally known as PPE: personal protection equipment. The full outfit, worn mainly by frontline medical workers, is quite intimidating when put on, and from what I’ve been told, not very comfortable. Yet it provides people with a greater sense of security, and along the way has likely saved some lives. But, what is the best way for average people to protect themselves? The answer hinges on what an individual sees as the real danger. Depending on the threat, the right protective covering can make all the difference. And it is especially true when battling an unseen enemy.
There are other invisible dangers in this world besides parasitic microbes. Yes, a pandemic is scary when we’re not sure where or how we might be infected. But what about the infestation of “spiritual viruses” that have eternal consequences? Do we as Jesus followers take them as seriously as we do nefarious microorganisms? These non-material adversaries also threaten us daily but assault the soul. They leave people broken, confused and completely lost: lies that are believed; shame and guilt that never leave; doubts; pride; fears; loneliness; despair. We have a spiritual enemy that spreads all this and more.
The Apostle Paul laid out God’s provision for our protection against such insidious infections and attacks in Ephesians 6:10-18. This passage envisions our struggle against unseen forces as a battle. Our survival, well-being and victory depend on our making use of armor that protects us from a hidden enemy intent on our destruction, or at least our ineffectiveness. The PPE that Paul outlines follows what was ancient-Roman battle gear. But the imagery is still applicable for Jesus followers today who are aware that spiritual sickness and brokenness are just as bad as, if not worse than, physical infirmity.
What is God’s Personal Protection Equipment for us?
The Belt of Truth (Ephesians 6:14a)
A lot of Jesus followers still carry debilitating burdens. Much of the baggage is rooted in the disinformation we believe about ourselves, the world around us, and particularly the nature and character of God. The power of a lie is that it feels true, and we then organize our lives around it. And when we rely primarily on what feels right within to determine what is real without, we are in danger of believing the wrong thing about so many life issues. Our lives easily end up stuck in places we never intended or wanted to be.
My baseline for reality must be grounded in something outside myself. Just as the other pieces of a Roman soldier’s armor were supported by and connected into his belt, truth for a Jesus follower is what binds the rest of God’s PPE together. If I am believing false stuff, particularly about my identity and who God is, nothing in my faith walk is secure. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). He is the One who must define truth for me—what He says, what He does, what He reveals—regardless what I feel at any given moment. Am I cinching the truth of Jesus more tightly around me? It holds everything else up afterall.
Read MoreChoosing to Take Temptation Seriously
No matter how hard I try, why are some things so difficult to resist? Overeating? Harsh responses to those who correct me? Anxiety about the future? I know how I should respond, what I’m supposed to do, and what I ought to feel. But that rarely gives me what I need to actually do it and never provides what is necessary to truly feel it. No matter what they say, will power alone does not have what it takes to change me and keep me strong against all the types of temptation that push on me.
A 15th Century German-Dutch follower of Jesus named Thomas á Kempis wrote, “The beginning of all evil temptations is a mind not firmly fixed on its purpose…”* I have pondered what this means for quite a while now, and I think brother Thomas has something to teach us. The understanding of my purpose is rooted in the understanding of my identity. Who and what I believe myself to be forms the foundation for all that I do and why I do it. But to make it a bit more complex, it’s not just what I believe about my purpose and identity that is key. The essential point is that these beliefs are what motivate me and they, in turn, shape me. I act according to who and what I interpret myself to be. My identity informs all that I do. How I view myself and my purpose then becomes that which determines how I make all my life decisions.
What’s the Connection?
So, what might be the relationship between temptation and what I believe about myself and my purpose? I have come to see that that which I most identify with makes up the integral part of the blueprint of the desires and feelings I submit to as well as those I resist. If I see myself fundamentally as someone suffering because of my environment and other people’s choices over which I have no control, I will find it difficult to resist the temptation to see myself as a victim. And I will more easily submit to resentment and bitterness, feeling stuck, like I have no other choice.
If, however, I understand myself primarily as one who is loved and valued, I can see more options when I make decisions. My purpose can more easily come into focus by believing there are those who believe in me. What I root my identity in and draw my sense of purpose from contribute greatly to whether or not I am emotionally stable. Purpose and identity are shaped by these mindsets that have captured my allegiance.
The Key to Resisting
Temptation then, particularly what brother Thomas calls “evil temptations,” gets a head start within the mind that is not fixed on its true purpose. And he is speaking here, of course, of the purpose that flows out of what God says about an individual who has embraced His Son, Jesus.
Read MoreChoosing Gentleness
My desire as a boy was to be strong. I was verbally and physically picked on in elementary school. The longing to demonstrate my strength led to a few fights and endless daydreaming of what that day would feel like when I could show the bullies what I had inside me. And there were also the models of “manliness” I was exposed to. Athletic coaches were the most influential. They taught me that to get ahead in sports and in the world, I needed to push harder, and do whatever necessary to be better than the person in front of me. Success would come to those who could overpower the next guy. My cumulative adolescent understanding was that strength was proportional to aggression and determination to subdue anyone who stood in my way. But my feelings of weakness always seemed to be the most powerful things within me. And as a result, I never could sustain any personal campaign of viewing myself as a conqueror.
And then there was Jesus. I prayed to surrender my life to Him when I was a boy. But as I read the Bible stories, I couldn’t escape the feeling that He, as my model, was just as weak as me. Pretty disheartening for a kid trying to figure out the secret of vanquishing abusers and proving to everyone, especially myself, that I wasn’t weak. Jesus, afterall, let Himself be bullied and eventually gave Himself up to be killed on a cross. What hope was there for me?
Quiet Strength
I was several years into adulthood before a new perspective began to take shape in my mind. I noticed in certain people what I came to refer to as “quiet strength.” They didn’t flash muscles or aggressive attitudes. But there was an unmistakable solidness in their convictions, purpose, and courage. There were even the ones who were so secure in their inner firmness that they could prefer and let others get ahead of them without coming across as weak and inferior. How could that be?
Read MoreChoosing What I Love
The word ‘love’ in English is quite pliable. I can say that I love my wife and I love pizza, and most people will not accuse me of reducing my spouse to a mere piece of pepperoni nor seeking to marry an Italian meal. The word can refer to a need (a plant “loves” water) or enthusiasm for a particular thing or activity (my son “loves” the Vikings). It can also describe a profoundly tender affection for another (I love my children). In addition, it can reference almost every positive feeling between the two extremes. This flexibility, however, can sometimes lull us into not thinking about what we mean when we use the word. For a follower of Jesus, care in what we say we love and particularly in what we actually do love has important theological, and eternal, implications.
When I talk about the concept of love with others, I like to point out that it is much more than a feeling. It’s a choice. Most people agree in theory but then get a bit uncomfortable when we examine how we actually apply the term. When we use phrases like “falling in love,” or “falling out of love” there’s no getting around the idea that we’re talking about an emotion that can be there one moment and gone another. Such usage leaves the impression that we are helpless victims to this thing we call love. So much of today’s relationships, romantic and otherwise, are centered on what we feel about a person at any given moment, which is in constant flux. And that stirs some deep insecurity in relationships, not to mention the cynicism associated with the word love.
A More Durable Understanding
The biblical presentation of love, however, talks about something more reliable than good and affectionate feelings. How else should we interpret Jesus’ command to “love one another” (John 15:12)? He tells His followers to do it, no qualifications or exceptions. Most people realize that feelings cannot be commanded to come or go. Instead, feelings tend to follow our choices and what we focus our attention on. The love Jesus is talking about, therefore, is something we choose to do. It’s a matter of obeying Him.
A definition I find helpful for this understanding of love is choosing to give the highest good to another. It’s what God does for us and what he tells us to do for others. Sometimes the words that carry the meaning of love the best are I still choose you.
Read MoreChoosing Intimacy
Most of my life growing up, I often felt misunderstood. I tried to relate to those around me by being who I thought they wanted me to be. But it felt like few, if any, ever saw the real me and said, “I like that person.” That took its toll, and I easily withdrew within myself. I became, at best, a private person. I longed for a friend that would accept me for who I was, yet neither did I ever allow the real me, with all my fears, insecurities, and sin to be seen. I built protective walls of shyness to keep the anticipated pain of rejection manageable and as far away as possible. But something within always ached for a connection with another that would provide a reason to open the door of my heart and truly be seen and known.
As a teen, I realized the name of the quality I hungered for was intimacy. Marriage, I then presumed, would satisfy this yearning. A sexual relationship, afterall, is the epitome of closeness and connection. And though it initially seemed to do the trick, I eventually came to an unexpected realization: a person can be married, sleep in the same bed with someone and still feel lonely and disconnected at times.
A Universal Desire
I, like so many, have longed for intimacy in my relationships but have found it elusive. There are moments when it seems to be within my grasp, conversations or activities with a friend or with my wife where the bond feels almost other-worldly. It’s as if we can see into each other’s soul. Yet it doesn’t last, fading with distance and time. I want to believe, however, that those moments are glimpses of what can be mine continuously, forever. But how?
And then there’s my relationship with God.
Read MoreChoosing the Long Way
There’s something gratifying about finding a way to make a long journey shorter. I look to my GPS for help these days. But even as a kid, shortcuts were always appreciated. When I was 12, my friends showed me a quicker way to the store where we could buy candy. It happened to go through a stranger’s backyard and across his patio. I used it many times until an angry man stuck his head out a window and yelled at me, threatening to call the cops. Shortcuts may get me where I want to be sooner, but they can create unforeseen problems as well. Seeking the quicker and easier way can become a mindset and habit that infects all my decision making.
The temptation to reach goals faster, cut corners or bypass steps in a process shows up in a multitude of situations. Businesses consider it by offering lower-quality products. Builders face it when trying to increase their profit margin. Students have to make a choice when they discover a way to cheat on a test and get the ‘A’ with no studying. I fall into it when I’m assembling IKEA furniture and don’t want to take time to read the instructions. Shortcuts offer a more direct path to an objective and the feeling that I have escaped unnecessary suffering or drudgery. But at what hidden cost?
The Easier Path
Jesus was offered a shortcut. It was His third temptation in the desert (for thoughts on the first and second, read Choosing to Not Take the Bait and Choosing to Not Test God). We’re told in Matthew 4:8-11 that the devil took Him to a high mountain where they saw all the kingdoms of the world and said he would give them to Jesus if He would only kneel before Satan. Of course Jesus resisted and told the devil to leave, reminding him that the scriptures instruct us to worship and serve God only. While it’s no surprise that He didn’t give in to Satan, I have wondered what was so attractive about the Evil One’s offer. What could possibly tempt Jesus to bow down to the devil?
Read MoreChoosing Peace
I once read an article by an atheist describing the serenity he felt as he overlooked a beautiful valley while drinking a cup of coffee. The point he was trying to make was that Christians do not have a monopoly on peace. He was irritated with the claim that religion is somehow necessary for a person to have a sense of tranquility. His way of refuting this was to recount the many times he had experienced an internal quiet and harmony with others without any acknowledgement of the divine. His conclusion was that a belief in God is not necessary to feel peacefully calm. And after reading all that he had to say, I had to agree with him. But is there more to it than what he was experiencing?
Jesus followers often talk about the peace that comes over us after surrendering our lives to Him. It’s often part of what we felt was missing in our lives. And it makes sense. Afterall, Jesus the Messiah is called the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6); one of the fruits of the Spirit is peace (Galatians 5:22): and peacemakers will be called the children of God (Matthew 5:9). But what exactly is this quality that is promised all throughout the Bible?
Shalom
The biblical Hebrew word is still used by many modern Israelis as a greeting. Its general sense is that of holistic goodness. The Old Testament presents shalom as a multidimensional quality that includes physical, psychological, social, and spiritual wellbeing. God’s shalom thus adds up to an overall sense of inner security for the person who experiences it, which imparts many benefits. One example is stated in Psalm 4:8. “In peace [shalom] I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety” (ESV). Biblical peace appears to be something that is not created by the individual but comes from God. It also appears that trusting Him is what activates His shalom in our lives.
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Choose This Day 